


Kisses Work

by darlingcarmilla



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency - Fandom
Genre: F/F, Sorry thisis just, absolutely cheesy fluff like, and cheesy, and farah knows dirk already and she works in a bar, and then like farah sees amanda and she's being gay af, it's so ridiculous i think, just basically like au where dirk n todd haven't met yet, sorry ive been listening to madden's alive so ive just been way too happy, sredtrfyguhiu
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-30
Updated: 2017-12-30
Packaged: 2019-02-24 02:08:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,158
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13203501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darlingcarmilla/pseuds/darlingcarmilla
Summary: Farah works at a bar and feels some gay feelings when she serves Amanda. Dirk is also there trying to help... trying.





	Kisses Work

"I'm, no- I'm... I'm fine Dirk, really." Farah said as she cleaned more glasses from behind the bar.  
"Really Farah? Really though?" Dirk replied, his voice getting high pitched on the 'reallys', just the right pitch to get on her nerves.  
"Dirk, I'm at work, I'm-" She noticed a customer, "I'm busy." She cut herself off before turning to the customer and getting them their drink, making a point of ignoring Dirk. He seemed unphased as ever, and jumped back into the conversation as soon as the customer left.  
"So, what's your type? I'm sure there's someone in here to..."

Farah rolled her eyes and frowned, "I swear, you are not getting me roped up in any of your Holistic things tonight Dirk! You promised you'd stay un-holistic tonight!"  
"That's... that's not how it works," he replied, before raising his hands to surrender as she raised her eyebrows, "But, I'm not actively trying to be Holistic, promise. I just thought you might be interested in starting up your dating life again, especially since we have more time on our hands..."  
"Uh, you may have more time on your hands, but I have a job Dirk. See this, what I'm doing right now?" she continued cleaning glasses, "Aren't you the one who's bored?"  
"You're bored? I never said you were bored, so... you're bored?" Dirk latched onto that and Farah sighed.  
"Listen, Dirk. I know you've done some... incredible work, however coincidental and perhaps unintentional it may have been, but regardless, I have customers to serve and-" She turned to the woman in a leather jacket standing in front of her, "Here's one right now."

The woman smiled an adorable smile and asked for some beer.  
Farah smiled back nervously and seemed a little flustered as she handed this woman her glass.  
"She's cute!" Dirk said loudly just as the woman left and was barely (maybe just) out of earshot.  
"Shut- shut up!" Farah replied, "You talk to her then."  
"But I thought the chemistry seemed quite-"  
"I don't even know if she's... y'know..."  
"I'm sure, using my brilliant skills of deduction I can figure that out for you."  
"Dirk don't-"  
He'd already left and Farah saw another customer walking up to the bar. She sighed.

Dirk approached the woman's table enthusiastically smile.  
"What?" the woman seemed annoyed.  
"Sorry to bother you, just for a moment, but... might I ask your name?"  
"Amanda?" she replied still quite annoyed, Dirk continued unphased.  
"Amanda, are you gay?"  
"Yeah, so?" she still seemed angry, Dirk decided it would be best to end this interaction now.  
"Um.... congratulations? Goodbye."  
Amanda raised her middle finger at him as he walked away.

"That looks like it went well." Farah said sarcastically as he approached the bar.  
Dirk was either incredibly oblivious or willfully ignorant, perhaps both, "It was fairly successful yes. Her name is Amanda. She's gay."  
Farah's expression changed and she took a long nervous breath.  
"So, are you going to make a move? You're obviously... interested, right?"  
"No, what? No... no that's... that's ridiculous that's-that's crazy. Shut up... you're... shut up."  
"So no?"  
"Obviously."  
"Yes, quite obviously of course. So I suppose that the fact that's she's coming back leaves you completely unphased?"  
Farah shushed him.

"Oh, it's the asshole again." Amanda said looking at Dirk, but talking to Farah.  
Farah laughed nervously, "Oh... yes, yes he is... an asshole."  
Dirk took that as a cue to leave and go do something else, he was sure he could find somewhere else to sit...  
"You friends?"  
Farah laughed, "Um... I don't... I suppose in a manner of speaking..."  
Amanda laughed back, "Don't worry about it."  
"I... I won't..."  
"Good." Amanda replied, and then after a moment of gazing directly into Farah's eyes said absentmindedly, "You're so cute."

"So are you." Farah murmured under her breath, flustered.  
"What?"  
"Nothing... n-nothing... that's not..." She bit her lip, "That's not... what did you um," Farah lifted her hand to rub against her neck nervously, "Did you want?"  
Amanda grinned and her dimple formed, Farah found herself grinning back, something she didn't often find herself doing.  
"What?" asked Amanda.  
"Hmm?"  
"What are you grinning about?"  
"Oh... oh well, I think just because... you were, and so..."  
"Oh, am I? I didn't even realise." Amanda replied, widening her smile.

They both stared at each other for a moment, Farah stood there, wanting to smile at Amanda forever, not wanting to move. God she was so glad no customers had interrupted them yet. She looked around but she couldn't see anyone who looked like they were going to approach her. Although Dirk seemed to be sitting near the bar being his weird self and perhaps discouraging people from coming up to them. She wasn't sure how she felt about that, but for the moment she couldn't focus on much more than Amanda in front of her.  
After a few more moments she started getting nervous and wondering what Amanda was thinking, so she spoke again, "So uh... what was it that you, um... you wanted?"  
It seemed like Amanda snapped back into reality again, Farah could feel herself almost holding her breath.  
"I just like, wanted to get another beer I guess... and to say hey."  
"Hey?"  
"Hey."  
They laughed.  
"Hey." Farah replied handing Amanda her beer.  
"Also... I was wondering if maybe..." Farah's breath caught in her throat as Amanda paused, "You might wanna go out with me some time?"

"You mean like... like... what are you....?" Farah stumbled over her words nervously.  
Amanda leaned forward so that they were maybe a few inches apart, Farah could practically feel Amanda's breath on her, it was warm and a little bitter...  
"I'm saying that I'm interested." She murmured.  
"Oh... you're.... in me? You mean to say that you're proposing, I mean not proposing but-"  
Amanda giggled, "I mean I'm asking you on a date."  
Farah grinned again, "Then yes, yes I'm, I'm definitely accepting the invitation, I'm..." she leaned forward slowly and softly kissing Amanda's lips and quickly pulled away.  
"Yes, I'm saying the... yes... I'm..."  
"Kisses work." Amanda replied breathlessly before Farah moved to kiss her again a little more forcefully before they pulled away.

Amanda started writing her number on a peice of paper, writing her name underneath.  
"Oh, I'm Farah, by the way."  
Amanda looked up and smiled, "Amanda."  
"I know." Farah smiled back.  
"Oh, because of your asshole friend?"  
Farah rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah him." Farah looked around, their little bubble between her and Amanda popped, looking over to see Dirk catch her glance and smile at her while giving her thumbs up.  
"Jesus, where did you find that guy?"  
"Long story." Farah replied.  
"You'll have to tell me more on our date Farah...?"  
"Farah Black. Amanda...?"  
"Brotzman."  
They giggled again and shook hands formally, laughing together.  
"Okay Amanda Brotzman." Farah said before pulling Amanda's hand a little closer so that they could kiss again. 


End file.
